Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
