so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
