i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
My breasts were aching with rage.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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