I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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