Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I wish they made helmets for livers.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
