Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
