I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
