D3 body, D1 cock
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
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