He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.