Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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