Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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