oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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