so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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