just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I think people are normalizing furries
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
