spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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