i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
