Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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