You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
