I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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