You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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