when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
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