I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
