it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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