is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
