I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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