1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
