There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
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