all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
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