just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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