I don't think brook has ever known best
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
