What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
