STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
