how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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