I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you would pick up someone in the library
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He passed out mid-signature
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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