For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Randomize
