how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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