Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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