We named our party play list daddy issues
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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