we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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