You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
