I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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