we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
