just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
