I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
