if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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