I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i dont even know how to be here
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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