We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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