hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
