This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Randomize
