Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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