:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
